11 REALISTIC Ways To Stop Social Media Draining Your Energy
It’s time to take control of your life and stop social media draining your energy on a daily basis. If you’re anything like me, you’ve probably found yourself doom-scrolling on social media more times than you’d like to admit.
As a Mindset and Productivity Coach for perfectionists (and a recovering perfectionist myself), I am always preaching about social media boundaries and energy management because it’s something that most of my clients struggle with.
It is so easy to get caught up in the world of comparison, doom-scrolling and feeling overwhelmed by constant distraction.
So today, I’m going to go through the reasons why social media is draining your energy and give you simple, practical tips to use social media in a way that supports your wellbeing.
What is social media fatigue?
Social media fatigue refers to the feeling of being overwhelmed, mentally exhausted or stressed out due to spending too much time on social media platforms.
This feeling of fatigue can express itself in a variety of different ways from feeling:
- Burnt out from constant online communication and messages
- Anxious or irritated when you get notifications or think about checking your inbox
- Annoyed and dissatisfied with using social media in general
I feel like most of us go through cycles of loving and then hating social media, so social media fatigue is often looked at as something normal.
In reality, we should try to find ways to use social media in a healthy way that doesn’t result in fatigue and burnout.
Why does social media drain your energy?
There are many reasons why social media drains your energy but for the purpose of this blog post, I’ve decided to focus on my top three reasons.
1. The pressure to be always online
For those of us who grew up with social media, it’s really common to feel pressure to always be available and responsive.
Many people set covert contracts with others and have expectations that they don’t communicate.
I don’t know about you but I’ve definitely experienced people getting upset with me because I’ve not replied to their message within a set time or according to their needs.
Back in the day, very few people had 24/7 access to another person whereas nowadays anyone can have 24/7 access to your time and attention IF you let them.
This alone is enough to cause increased levels of stress and burnout.
2. Constant notifications
Notifications, notifications, notifications… you can’t escape them.
Every single app and every single website wants you to sign up for push notifications and email alerts.
These constant notifications interrupt your focus and concentration which leads to decreased productivity and an overall sense of not being good enough, especially for perfectionists.
Notifications also rewire the reward centre in your brain so that you feel like you constantly need to check for notifications to get that hit of dopamine.
It’s not healthy but businesses don’t care about your health, they want your time and your attention.
That’s why they hire the top behaviour psychologists to create the most alluring notifications that trigger urgency and anxiety within you.
3. Passive consumption
Mindlessly doom scrolling through social media content without actively engaging with it is very common nowadays.
So much wasted time. So much wasted potential.
And so much guilt and shame because you know you’ve wasted your time yet you still scroll on to see the next video, next post or next piece of drama.
It’s addicting and often leads to information overload, brain rot and an all-consuming feeling of mental fatigue.
Signs social media is toxic for you
- You feel drained after posting on social media
- You waste hours doom-scrolling and feel guilty
- You find it hard to put your phone down
- You constantly feel overwhelmed
- You feel like you’re trapped in a never-ending cycle
- You constantly compare yourself to others
- Your sleeping pattern is dependent on your social media usage
- Phubbing – you snub people in favour of using your phone
Is it possible to use social media in a healthy way?
I truly believe it is possible to use social media in a healthy way however it is completely dependent on each person and requires strict boundaries and a high level of self-awareness.
One method of using social media may work for some people but not others which is why you need to use trial and error to find the techniques that work for you.
For example, people who already have close family connections and friendships may use social media as a way to share information rather than as a tool to gain external validation.
It just depends on how you use social media and whether you’re using social media to meet your needs in an adaptive or maladaptive way.
The truth is some people will always struggle to use social media healthily and that could be due to genetic dispositions to addictions, an inability to stick to boundaries or an all-or-nothing way of thinking (which is something that perfectionists definitely struggle with).
At the end of the day, you just need to figure it out yourself.
Personally, I prefer to limit my social media usage to the minimum level because the negatives of social media outweigh the positives FOR ME.
You may have a different opinion.
The goal is to focus on WHY you are using social media and HOW you can use it most effectively and efficiently.
11 steps to stop social media draining all your energy
1. Do a social media audit
It’s really important to identify how much time you actually spend on social media and take note of the platforms that you use the most.
Because it’s so easy to be in denial and not realise that you have a problem with using social media in a healthy way.
A social media audit will give you the chance to understand how social media affects your mood and productivity with clear data.
For example, I didn’t think I spent much time on Instagram however, when I activated my screen time settings I was SHOCKED to see how quickly those little 5-minute doom-scrolling sessions added up throughout the day.
How to do it:
- Use apps like Screen Time (iOS) or Digital Wellbeing (Android) to track your usage
- Review your social media accounts to evaluate the content you interact with and its impact on you
- Use a bullet journal tracker or Excel spreadsheet to track your energy levels throughout the day
- Note down patterns, such as the times of day you’re most active and how you feel before and after using social media
2. Unfollow or mute accounts
Unfollowing social media accounts that make you feel bad, jealous or negative is one of the best things you can do for your mental health and well-being.
You don’t even need to justify the reason why you’re unfollowing these people as you owe them nothing. At the end of the day, your social media account is just for you and nobody else.
A couple of years ago I made a conscious decision to curate my social media feed so that it contained only the people that I cared about and people who inspired me to be a better version of myself.
Sometimes it meant unfollowing certain self-help gurus because their messaging was not in alignment with my values. For example in order to motivate and inspire change in others they used shaming techniques and that just doesn’t align with me at all.
Some of my friends only use social media to view cute animals such as dogs and alpacas. I don’t feel offended if they don’t follow me back because I know it’s not personal and I have a real-life connection with them.
If unfollowing feels like too harsh of a step, you can always mute accounts so that they don’t show up in your feed.
How to do it:
- Regularly review your follow list and unfollow accounts that don’t add value to your life
- Use the mute feature to hide posts from accounts you can’t unfollow for social reasons but still want to limit
- Follow accounts that align with your interests and values
3. Ban yourself from doom-scrolling
I need you to remember this: doom scrolling is the enemy. It is Satan himself. Okay?
Doom-scrolling is one of the most addictive and dangerous things about social media. These apps are designed to keep you scrolling so that you consume more adverts and make the businesses more money.
Remember if something is free YOU are the product.
So to prevent emotional and mental drain caused by excessive doom-scrolling of negative views and content you need to ban yourself from doom-scrolling.
That might mean banning the reels tab on Instagram and yes, you can do that with certain apps – I’ve done it myself so I know it’s possible.
Or you might just have the mental discipline to avoid clicking on the home feed and only use social media as a messaging device instead.
When you start doom scrolling you are passively consuming whatever the algorithm wants you to consume and most of the time making you angry, upset or intrigued by drama is the fastest way they can get you to stay on that app.
Be strong.
How to do it:
- Set specific time limits for checking news and avoid scrolling through neverending feeds (reels, home pages, for you page etc…)
- Use browser extensions or apps that block certain keywords or content types (e.g. Stay Focusd)
- Replace doom-scrolling with positive activities, like reading uplifting articles or watching educational videos
4. Go on a social media detox
I am the queen of social media detoxes. I truly believe going on a social media detox is the best way to break the cycle of toxic social media usage because it forces you to find a new hobby.
You’ll also realise how draining social media is in your life by just having a complete break from it.
I went on a six-month social media detox last year and it changed my life forever. It made me realise that I had a background level of anxiety due to constantly consuming information, adverts and distractions on a daily basis.
Cutting it out completely enabled me to clear my mind and become a more grounded version of myself.
It’s time to reconnect with your true self and stop avoiding yourself by using social media.
How to do it:
- Decide on a detox duration – it could be a weekend, a week, or longer
- Let your friends and family know about your detox so they can support you (or at the very least, not send out a search party for you)
- Use the time to engage in offline activities you enjoy, such as reading, hiking, or spending time with the people you care about
- For a more detailed guide, check out this blog post
5. Put app limits in place
If you’re not going to go on a social media detox then I highly recommend you set clear boundaries around your social media usage by setting app limits
App limits allow you to control the amount of time you spend on social media to make sure you’re not wasting most of your day doom-scrolling.
For example, for many months I had a 20-minute daily app limit for Instagram and that was plenty because it gave me enough time to respond to my messages without falling Into the trap of watching never-ending reels.
It’s a really quick and easy way to use social media without your energy being completely drained and encourages you to be more balanced and intentional with how you spend your time.
How to do it:
- Use features on your phone, like Screen Time (iOS) or Digital Wellbeing (Android), to set daily limits for each app
- If possible, ask a friend to set a password for your app limit to prevent you from dismissing the notification
- Set specific time slots for social media use, such as during lunch breaks or after work
- Review and adjust the limits regularly based on your needs and goals
6. Only use it in alignment with your values
It is important to be intentional when using social media which is why I recommend you only use social media if it is in alignment with your values.
Your values are the key qualities and principles that matter the most to you. For example, integrity might be one of your core values or kindness or adventure.
Every single one of us has values and we place them in different priority levels. This is why it’s so important to know what your values are so that you can use social media effectively.
For example, I took a step back from using social media in my business because I felt like it no longer aligned with my values and I wasn’t willing to compromise my integrity for the sake of boosting my visibility.
It becomes much easier to make difficult decisions when you know what your values are.
How to do it:
- Define your core values and goals before engaging with social media
- You can download the FREE Values Over Perfection Workbook to help you
- Follow accounts and join groups that reflect and support these values
- Avoid content and interactions that contradict your values or make you feel negative
- If you feel like social media is pulling you further away from your values, redo your audit and amend your usage
7. Have phone-free evenings and mornings
If for whatever reason you are unable to go on a full social media detox or put app limits in place then I highly recommend you try having phone-free evenings and mornings.
It’s a great way to create time for relaxation and self-care without overwhelming distractions. You can still use social media throughout the day but you craft intentional time for life in the real world where you can engage in hobbies and clear your mind.
Also having phone-free mornings and evenings enables you to have better sleep and start your day in a much better mood so that you can manage your energy more effectively.
How to do it:
- Set a specific time in the evening to turn off your phone, such as one hour before bed
- In the morning, delay checking your phone until after you’ve completed your morning routine
- Use this time for activities like reading, meditating, or enjoying a quiet breakfast
8. Ban your phone from your bedroom
Your environment plays a really important role in the energy management process which is why it’s so important to ensure your bedroom is a space for relaxation and sleep.
It’s not healthy to be staring at your phone screen while you’re in bed so banning your phone from your bedroom will promote better sleep hygiene because it reduces your exposure to blue light before going to sleep.
How to do it:
- Charge your phone outside the bedroom, such as in the living room or kitchen
- Use a traditional alarm clock or a sunrise alarm instead of your phone to wake up
- Develop a bedtime routine that doesn’t involve screens, like reading a book or practising relaxation techniques
9. Pick up an alternative hobby
Do something different. It’s as simple as that.
Think about all the time you’ve wasted spending on social media with nothing to show for it and now think of all the things you could be doing instead of using social media.
Things that boost your energy, make you feel good and excited about life. I’m sure you probably have a hobby that you’ve really wanted to try but never had the time to do.
Well now’s the time. Give it a go and see what happens!
When I decided to be intentional with my social media usage I discovered a passion for writing poetry, blogging (it’s how The Valued Life started), drawing, singing and dancing albeit terribly.
How to do it:
- Identify hobbies you’ve always wanted to try or past interests you’ve forgotten about
- Dedicate specific times each week to engage in these hobbies
- Join local clubs or online communities to connect with others who share your interests
- Don’t take yourself too seriously, have fun with it and let go of perfectionism
10. Turn off notifications
My notifications have been turned off for YEARS now and I have absolutely no regrets. Turning off your notifications is a great way to minimise distractions and interruptions throughout the day so that you can focus on the things that actually matter.
Over time you’ll notice your compulsion to check your phone every few minutes reduces as time goes on.
Remember there is a reason why these notifications make a sound the colour red and flash up at certain times – it’s all designed to be addictive almost like a slot machine in a casino. The companies want to keep you hooked and clicking on their apps and by default viewing their adverts.
How to do it:
- Go to your phone’s settings and turn off notifications for social media apps
- Customise notification settings to receive only essential alerts
- You can set a scheduled notification summary that displays at set times a day if you don’t want to completely eliminate notifications from your phone
11. Journal
I recommend you journal throughout this whole social media energy audit. Use it as a chance to reflect on the reasons why you use social media and the benefits you gain from it as well as the negative impact that has on your life.
It’s important to get into the habit of journaling often and consistently because then you will be able to notice patterns more quickly and gain insight into the best way for you to use social media without it draining your energy.
I can give you all the tips in the world but at the end of the day, you need to figure it out for yourself and the easiest way to do that is through deep honest reflection.
How to do it:
- Set aside a few minutes each day or week to write about your social media experiences
- Note how you feel before and after using social media, and any patterns you notice in your behaviour and/or thinking patterns
- Use your journal to set goals and track your progress in managing social media use
You can stop letting social media drain your energy
Remember, it’s all about progress, not perfection. Taking these steps to manage your social media use is a wonderful way to honour your time and energy.
Be gentle with yourself as you make these changes and celebrate each small victory along the way.
You deserve to feel empowered and at peace, both online and offline. By setting healthy boundaries, you’re creating a more balanced, fulfilling life for yourself.
Keep going. You’ve got this!
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Related Posts
- How To Go On A 6 Month Social Media Detox
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- How to escape the distraction economy and simplify your life
- How To Protect Your Energy And Peace In Chaos
- How To Identify Energy Givers and Energy Takers
- 5 energy management techniques to elevate your life
- How To Be Anti-Hustle Culture And Productive – 8 Simple Steps
Is it possible that taking a break from social media could actually harm your mental health in the long run by cutting you off from important connections and sources of information?”,
“refusal
Hey Anurag, thanks for commenting! Honestly, I think the only way a social media break would harm your mental health is if you don’t have healthy support systems. I’ve found that having a break forced me to create healthier connections in real life and not rely on the ‘fake’ dopamine hit connections that social media encourages. Moderation is key.